Ok so I will finally get up to date here since I just started this blog a few weeks ago I feel as if hours, days, weeks, and months are just flying by. Photos will follow of ultrasound pics and memory keepsakes when I get the chance to download them on here. I remember since it was Easter weekend my mom took me to Walmart about 2 days after everything and she had me sit in a wheelchair. As I sat in the wheelchair and watched people looking at me I just wanted to reach out to each pregnant women and tell them how lucky they are. It was SO hard to see pregnant women. Till this day its still hard. But God blessed me with a little belly for 3 months and I give Him thanks and have to give Him all the Glory for what He helped create in my womb thru my husband and I for a short and beautiful time. Thank you to my Heavenly Father. We love you baby Nehemiah. So back to my trip at Walmart with my mom and me in the wheelchair...LOL So since it was Easter they had alot of stuffed animals and I saw the cutest little lamb or maybe its a sheep..LOL I don't know my animals.. gosh! Since it had a little blue ribbon around the neck area I said "I want that one" since I felt our Angel In Heaven may be a boy. I slept with my little animal that night and it now sits on top of my dresser in our bedroom. It's something so small that reminds me of my baby Nehemiah. Verses that come to mind that have been revealed to me are:
"I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy." John 16:20
"So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy." John 16:22
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33
These scriptures have really calmed my heart in many occasions. I hope they speak to any of you who have had a loss or just are grieving. I remember when I was discharged they handed me a paper of a "Prenatal Death" support group. I called the number which was in the hospital and the lady told me "ma'am im sorry but we no longer have those since some ladies wouldn't show up we stopped holding those meetings" in my mind I was just fighting inside saying "how dare they!" I came to realize that thru His Word and His tender loving care that I have been blessed with I will be in His arms. How incredibly is He!!! Thank you Lord Jesus for letting me cling to You! When I think of what I've gone thru I know I am not alone. I think of the book of Job, of how he was such a godly man who went thru so much suffering but yet he remained faithful to God. I think of all those around me who have losts loved ones. I am NOT ALONE!